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Bisexuals get hurt just as much as the rest of us. So gay men, lesbians, and straight people: It was childish, but the feeling is understandable: I was the cheater. Until about six months ago, when my phone buzzed with a text message from a name I never expected to see on my screen again:
But I understand where this misconception comes from. In reality all it did was make women confused by me and the other boys in my grade skeptical. It was like the one fear we both had about the relationship being cleared up! I cheated on him and lied about it for months. I could attempt to rationalize my cheating and say that I did it because I thought, as a bisexual, he would rebound fast with a girl or hit his larger playing field with a vengeance. In the long run, our relationship changed me for the better — at his expense. I had been nervous about dating a bi person and was initially filled with jealous insecurity every time I thought about the fact that he was noticing women too. We both needed to hug. The whole time I thought, Oh no. My ex watched lesbian porn one night and it made me really uncomfortable. I wanted to know if men who are actually bi still face this stigma as grown adults in , so I asked 10 of them about how women reacted to them being bisexual and their answers will surprise you. Bisexuals get hurt just as much as the rest of us. But even if a bisexual person does cheat, it's hardly evidence that bisexuality inclines a person toward infidelity. That hurt had nothing to do with his sexual orientation and nothing to do with his place in the LGBT acronym. He was clearly attracted to something I would never be able to offer him, and I feared that unmet desire would cause him to seek satisfaction elsewhere. I cheated on him and lied about it for months. I was the cheater — not him. At most, it's only evidence that the person cheated and is therefore not presently cut out for monogamous dating. I was the cheater. Our temporary claims of bisexuality damage the credibility — and the dating field — of those whose bisexuality is far from temporary. It sucked because literally everyone I talked to seemed like a threat to her. By Alexander Cheves September 05 In fact, he was unbearably monogamous and loyal to a fault. He had every right to hate me, as did all of his friends and all of his family, who welcomed me for a two-week stay one summer when we were together. It took a while to learn that my insecurity was on me, and my nervousness was misplaced. In actuality, our orientations slightly overlapped, like Venn diagrams — our relationship existed in the purple area between his bisexual red and my gay blue.
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